Well deserved asswhippings

When I was a kid, I remember seeing Il Trovatore on some public channel, and they had the anvils wired electrically or some such thing so that when the guys hit the anvil sparks flew out. I thought it was the coolest damned thing there was.
I got the idea, hey, why couldn’t I do the same kind of thing? Turns out I could
Remember Stallion Caps? the little round self adhesive caps that certain kinds of capguns used? well, I had a big handful of them, and i loved using them. Beat ‘em with rocks, lay ‘em on your skin and hit ‘em with a ruler, I thought they rocked. SO I thought nothing of it, when, in the middle of a roof construction job I’d put a whole bag of them on random roofing nails.
Dad was re-roofing the house, see, and since he had a day job, he was doing it a little at a time, at night. Turned out to be a big pain in the ass, but what the hell. Anyway, one night, as it’s getting darker, he asks me for more nails. I climb up the ladder with the box, whch he puts in his apron, and immeditatley grabs one of the “modified” nails. He takes one swing, the cap pops, a little yellowish flame jets out from under the hammer, and he grabs me by the straps of my bib overalls, and smacks my ass in midair.
hey, i thought it was cool.
Dad, busy with the roof, was less than amused. Imagine that.

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