Thursday, January 04, 2007

fence charger, part two

Not horribly long after the time of the previous post, Dad loaned the infamous Fence Charger to one of the neighbors to help keep his sorrel mare in the corral, and the neighbor’s kid had zapped himself a time or two touching it. He was the neighborhood bully, and at five years older and a solid fifty pounds heavier, I got my ass kicked by him on a regular basis. His name was Randy. I’m not gonna disguise his name because he was a prick then, and is probably, if he hasn’t overdosed since then, a prick now. John and I were leaning on the edge of the corral watching Randy ride, (god forbid he let Us ride, or anything) and said ‘how does that wussy old electric fence keep that horse in, anyway?’ I was about to slap him and I noticed his hand. Rand couldn’t see it, but where John was pointing, you could see the charger from where we stood, and the pulse was set way out. It went six, seven seconds before it hit. Randy, always ready to make an ass out of himself, said “yeah, well touch it then” SO john did. being more coordinated than me he was able to juuust let go when the light came on. I said “what’s the big deal? John and I used to piss on this thing when it was at my house” Randy, ever the ass, said “Well, let’s see ya do it now, you fucks” So We unzipped, and let the strem cross the wires, as long as the light was off, and we were fine. Apparently Randy didn’t know the deal about the timer. “That don’t mean nothing. THe piss isn’t metal, it ain’t gonna zap you” SO he swings a leg off the horse, straddles one stirrup and the board top rail of the fence, and starts to piss. He stays on for a couple seconds and says ‘See, you turds? this ain’t AAAAAAAAAGHHH!” and keels over backwards, one foot still in the stirrup, while the horse stands still (thankfully)and he starts thrashing around on the ground, stiff teenage cock at attention, still pissing all over himself, hanging by his foot from his horse.
For reasons still unknown to me, but I suspect known to the horse, the horse starts pissing, and the stream hits randy’s thigh and splashes all over him too. John and I run home, laughing so hard we can barely stand it. Randy tries to beat our asses later but to no avail.

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